I’m currently teaching a course on the ‘Politics of Language’ and it has really reminded me (more so than usual) the extent to which language, the fabric of our everyday lives, is so politicized. Language, broadly speaking as what we say with our words and with our bodies, can be both liberating and limiting. How often, as a woman of color, do I have this thought process getting dressed for work in the morning: “This ______ makes me feel confident, but will I be taken seriously?” The fact that we constantly have this push and pull in our everyday decision-making about how we present ourselves gets at something that Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez mentioned in a Vogue make-up video last summer, where she walked viewers through her morning routine. Somehow pulling off a political commentary on patriarchy via candid make-up tutorial, she said the following about these seemingly mundane, quotidian decisions:
“at a certain moment, it stops being about choice, but about patriarchy.”
Let me contextualize.
UCI sociologists, Jaclyn Wong and Andrew Penner, released a study in 2016 concluding that women who wear make-up are likely to get paid more (read study here.) What that actually means is that we are better compensated when we look more attractive to men, especially because the people and structures who call the shots are mostly men or have been made by men. But it’s not only about men’s gazes we’re concerned with here. When other people’s (even other women's) questioning or confirmation of the legitimacy of your existence is at play, patriarchy is proving alive and well.
So just when you think wearing a little more lipstick is a win-win, boosting your confidence and your pay, are you actually participating in that patriarchal system?
Well, no. Stopping there would not only be cynical but also concession – if we go about our lives feeling dejected because everything we do seems politicized out of our control, then we really are perpetuating that external judgment of our value. But what if we deliberately wear lipstick, get paid more, and god forbid...enjoy it? What if we decide to wear those heels, and when someone at work asks, we respond without hesitation, “Manolo Blahniks”? Who then owns that judgment of value? (Hint: you). Sure, these are material things, but if they make you happy, if you bought them with your hard-earned money, if they are the shoes that take you out of discomfort into success, and you feel better about yourself because of that, then let that be your message to the world. We cannot pour from an empty cup, and value from within is the source of our work in the world. As Ocasio-Cortez said in her video, it seems that self-love, in our day and age, is our little protest to a society that normalizes anything but.
There will be those who claim fashion and beauty to be superficial, but who will rely on those very external factors to make high-stakes judgment calls like whom to hire and whom to trust.
Our actions and appearances as woman, queer and transgender folks will continue to be positioned as provocative choices when they are to us, meaningful methods of navigating this world.
For Ocasio-Cortez, who’s been in constant scrutiny in the media because her designer suits and magazine coverage seem to undermine her cause, a red lip is her middle finger to the world (or at least to the likes of Jimmy Dore). For me, I announce “I’m here” with a loud block heel. What about you?
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