Disclaimer: I don’t buy anything at retail price!
Last week’s blog by Yen made me think about my own shopping habits. Seriously y’all, I can no longer bring myself to pay full price for anything (clothes, shoes, bags, jewelry, make-up, and the list goes on to home goods). Admittedly, this hasn’t always been my attitude. I suppose that a mixed bag of embarrassment and respectability kept me from the clearance rack. I was very afraid of being snubbed by a sales associate. So, to compensate for my humble background, I used to walk over to the new, full-priced items under the prying eyes of the clerks and security guard. I thought paying full price was my pass into the respectable space and identity. But, you can never be rich, famous, or beautiful enough not to be racially profiled while shopping. We only need to think about what happened to Oprah in 2013 at the Hermès Boutique in Switzerland.
So today, I want to write about shame and embarrassment.
In a sense, I lived in the trap set by respectability politics. Harwood McClerking, an Africology Professor at University of Wisconsin-Milwaukee, is not entirely wrong when he quips that the politics of respectability is “the idea that [Blacks] need to improve their behavior… So white people will see it and reward us.” For me, it didn’t so much matter the clothes or the items, but rather that I could afford them. At the very least the cashier and I would know that I purchased them with my own credit card (AH!). In all conscience, however, I was motivated as a Black woman to reject white stereotypes of my over-sexualized body.
Yet, at what cost, emotional and financial, do we keep wanting respectability? It has been some years since I stopped wanting to be respectable. I suppose the reason is the culmination of several but related events in my life that betrayed the myth of respectability. First, I worked from 2000 to 2006 in an industry where how you dress is (present tense!) more important than how you think. Worse still in this line of work, the body shaping the clothes gained more attention. So, while you could blur the line of your socio-eco class with a tailored white shirt (à la Carolina Herrera), you certainly couldn’t hide your race. Next, I played muse to a man who would heap luxury goods on me at the drop of a dime. But, being given these gifts made them meaningless because I did not earn them.
I came to redefine respectability then with holding my head up high. Of course, this was the wrong way to think about it; my worth was not tied to my outfit. Black feminists and activists would rate this type of “respectability politics as reactionary, subordinated groups frequently use these tactics to gain upward mobility.” Even so, I created a fashion narrative that was particularly self-deluding: “clothes were my armor.” And voilà it worked; all too well!
In academic spaces, what I wore would generate backhanded comments like “my, my don’t we look chic today,” or "how could anyone ever discriminate against you, just look at the way you dress." In social spaces, the same skirt or pumps would draw the sneers and smirks of some depending on their relative position to my own identity as a Black woman. I push aside these instances and use the high-price tag items in my closet to my own benefit. Wearing a pair of James Jeans (purchased at $25, but retailed at $185 or more), I walk to the far corner of the JCrew (or any store) where the clearance items are kept hidden from the masses and rummaged (not carelessly) for the thing worth buying. Perhaps, while browsing in Tory Burch flats (purchased at less than $30, but retailed at $125), I ask the sales associate about the additional discount marked.
Ain’t no shame in shopping. My policy has been to only buy at 70% or more discount. How you ask? The hype of holiday sales is often overrated. The best times to shop are during the sample sale summer months (if you’re in NYC, head on over to 260 Sample Sale 5th and 32nd and follow the long lines), end of season sales December and July online (if you can wait it out, your favorite brands will pile on the discounts). Some advice before setting off on your next bargain hunt:
1. Don’t be afraid to ask for extra discounts (students get an extra 15% at JCrew).
2. Hang on to the item with the missing button, it might get you an extra 10% off (a button will likely cost much less).
3. Don’t worry who is watching if you put it back because it is out of your budget.
4. Don’t be ashamed to return an item. Reason not required!
Outfit:
JCrew: multicolor pencil skirt with unfinished hem, stretch cotton button white shirt, backless cage black mules, cream wide knot headband, layered pearl chain.
Work cited:
o “Performing a Vanilla Self: Respectability Politics, Social Class, and the Digital World” by Mikaela Pitcan, Alice Marwick, and Dana Boyd
o “Respectability Politics: How a flawed conversation sabotages black lives” by Brando Simeo Starkey
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